His Calling Needs to Alter My Perspective

"Blessed be the God and Father our Lord Jesus Christ ago has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavnely places, even as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before Him. In love, he predestined for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will, to the praise of His glorious grace, with which He has blessed us in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon us, with all wisdom and insight, making known to us the mystery of His will, according to his purpose which he set forth in Christ, as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth." 

Ephesians 1:3-10

Today I am committing to changing my perspective. I get so caught up in MY life, MY responsibilities, and MY earthly perspective that I forget altogether about the greatness of God's love and grace and all that he has called me to. Much more than a mom or wife, I am first and foremost a daughter of the Most High King. And the realization of that needs to alter my worldly perspective and shatter my selfish/self-focused way of living. 

This morning I have been reading in Ephesians, which is one of my absolute favorite books of the Bible. These verses remind me of the great love of Christ and that He found it in His glorious grace to save ME. And my life is now called to be holy and blameless and to bring praise to His glorious grace. What a calling. 

And to be honest, I don't live up to that. I fail all the time. I lose sight of the cross as I get so wrapped up in my earthly circumstances. Raising my babies, serving my husband, cleaning and shopping, ect. All of which are good things, but so trivial compared to Christ. 

It's time for a perspective change. 

He chose ME, to bring HIM glory. To shout HIS praises; to share HIS love. I cannot take this lightly nor can I allow earthly circumstances to cloud my focus. Spending time in His Word and in His presence can't be an "if I have time or energy" activity. He is my life source. Without Him I cannot be the mother, wife, or woman of God I want and need to be. He needs to be my everything, and the quality of all other life roles and responsibilities will flow from Him; if He remains my center. 

Time to re-prioritize. 

One Year.

Well here we are...

My little love bug is one year old! 

Not sure how it happened, but he's grown into a little boy!

This first year of being his mommy has been quite the journey

From the NICU to his big first birthday bash coming up this weekend seems like it happened in the blink of an eye. I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around him being so big.

But he grew. And so did I. 

Learning how to care for him and become a mother has been such a deeper refining process in my own spirit than I ever imagined.

I am reminded daily, no moment by moment, of my need for the Holy Spirit to reign over me. I need His patience when I run out, His love when I am empty, His peace when I'm overwhelmed. 

I need Him.

I need Him more than I ever have before. 

Getting through days without prayer has become nearly impossible now. In the past I was able to cling to my false sense of self sufficiency but in motherhood there is no such thing.

And I am grateful.

Grayson is wildly energetic and has a very strong will

He is still the smiliest baby I've ever seen and he has such a love for life that I get to see played out every single day. He is such a joy. 

And such a challenge :)

I adore this boy.

For all the hard days, there are just as many fun days filled with laughter. 

He is such a gift, and I try to embrace each day as such.

As for a stat update on Grayson...

He is standing unassisted and he even took his first steps this week!

He is almost 20 pounds and is just about ready for a big boy car seat.

He eats constantly. His favorite food are bananas.

He is busy, busy, on the go, all day long.

Keeps me running!

He loves to read books, climb stairs, and go for long walks in the stroller.

He has begun to develop quite the little temper and discipline has started to reach a new level. He actually understands how to intentionally disobey now as well as how to throw a temper tantrum when he gets upset. All I have to say is that I'm praying for patience and grace. Lol

Motherhood is much more messy than I had ever thought.

I fail so much. I question myself constantly. And I pray for grace continually.

I do my best but I always feel I need to be doing better, and I can only hope that the Lord will continue to work on me, and make me into the mom He wants me to be.

My daily prayer is this:

"Lord teach me how to parent Grayson is such a way

 that it teaches him well, glorifies you, 

and encourages those around me."

11 Months

This month has been amazing

Watching Grayson grow and learn is so much fun!

All in one week, Grayson began to stand by himself with no support, walk around the house holding our hands, and he learned to say the word "ball" :) 

He also learned how to play catch all by himself! I didn't even try to teach him. I just tossed him the ball and then he threw it back to me. And now catch is one of his favorite games!
He claps when we clap or say "yay" and he waves when people come or go.
He is starting to put so many things together and I'm continually impressed by him.

Grayson turning 11 months has been a little bit emotional for me. 

It is hitting me that next month he will be ONE. He won't be my little baby anymore.... He is going to be a little boy: a toddler. The days that I will always refer to as "when Grayson was a baby..." will soon be over. My baby is growing up. 

His baby days are almost gone, forever.

While this momma's heart aches to see her baby grow up... it is also so much fun to watch him go through new phases. This picture shows his goofy hands and feet crawl.
He cracks me up when he does this!
He is such a character :)

One of my favorite things, of all time, will always be Grayson's tiny, adorable, perfect, baby feet! Sometimes when I'm holding him or nursing him, I just hold his little foot in my hand. 

I could just cry when I think about how fast he is growing. 

So soon he will be a big smelly stinky boy and my little sweet happy smiley baby will be gone. 

Oh how I wish I could freeze these days. 

10 Months

Ahh sweet spring time! :)

Our baby bug is 10 months old... and these months seem to be flying by. 

Before I know it, he is going to be one!

It just doesn't feel possible

This month has had it's challenges.

Grayson usually sleeps really well, and only wakes up once each night, around 3am, to nurse. But lately he has woken up a lot and I wasn't sure why. Until one day, I was feeding him lunch and he chomped down on my finger... 

Ouch! There was a TOOTH in there!

I had no idea he was even teething! So over the past month or so he has broken through two teeth! And now that they're coming in rather quickly, he is definitely drooling more, not sleeping well, and acting fussy here and there. 

But overall he is teething like a champ! 

Also, (you would hardly know it cuz he's such a happy camper...) but Grayson has been pretty sick on and off this month. He had a virus called Roseola and now he has a cold :(

I feel pretty bad for my little guy.

But as usual, he keeps smiling :) 

Grayson does all kinds of big-boy things lately

Waving

Standing

Walking along furniture

Walking with his baby walker

Eating anything and everything we give him

Drinking from a sipppy cup

Saying "dada" and all kinds of other babbles

He is such a fun sweet little boy

We have so much fun!

He loves to play outside, although he's not too sure how he feels about the feel of grass. Lol. He doesn't mind eating it though :) Goofball

We love to go to the park and swing.

And he adores long walks in the stroller because he's finally big enough to sit in the forward facing seat and see the world :)

As usual, my heart is so full.

I seriously look at him each day and wonder how in the world I got blessed with such a wonderful, perfect little boy. 

I guess it's just the momma-love in me and it will probably never fade away. 

I'm so proud of him and so thankful I get to be his mommy.

I pray that I can be the mommy he deserves and that I can show him the love and grace of Christ. 

PS Nothing is better than green grass and spring time toes :)

9 Months

Ummm.... Excuse me?

Who told my baby he could grow up!?

This cutie is now 14 pounds, 26 inches tall and learning new things every single day!

He no longer accepts pureed foods. He wants to CHEW (although he has no teeth yet).

And he also has learned to feed himself finger foods... 

What a mess! But he thinks its awesome!

He eats all kinds of things nowadays.

Eggs, cheese, baby yogurt, toast, baby puffs, fruits and veggies... The works!

He's still a great eater but is a little more particular on what he likes and dislikes. 

Grayson is now a lean mean crawling machine!

All in a matter of a week or two he learned to crawl! 

It's been so fun watching him learn new things and explore the house! 

Overall, this ninth month has been such a whirlwind for us. 

I am just amazed at him. Each day there is something new he's mastering. He's been talking more. He still mostly coos and yells.... but the babbling has definitely begun. "Dada" was the first two syllable babble he did. Daddy was pretty proud :) And we had to move the crib mattress all the way down because he is pulling himself up and standing every chance he can get. 

He still wakes once a night to nurse but otherwise goes down at 7 and wakes up at 6. 

Grayson is such a blessing. 

Most days I have no idea why the Lord chose me to be the mommy 

of the cutest most smiley baby on the planet... 

But I am sure glad he did 

:)